Disclaimer: This is a real life story. But some parts are purely fictional and exaggerated. The author shall not be liable for any loss suffered due to overdose of laughter or grossness. Any negative feedback shall not be entertained. You have been warned. Thank you very much.

It was the final showdown.

And the stage was set.

In one corner, stood the blue player; a.k.a. Leng Chai Ong Kay Jin; naked (off with you filthy heads!) and armed with his trusty blue tong and water bucket.

The other corner, a multi legged centipede, armed with, what else – legs, threatening to strike our favourite neighborhood superhero with its deadly itchy legs.

And there it is:

Kay Jin HATES bugs. Not bugs of any sort. He is okay with ants, house spiders, lizards, cockroaches. He can tolerate them, be in peace with them and live in harmony with them.

But not these thousand or million legged creepy crawlers. He loathes them to the bone. If there is any terminate bugs organization, do let him know. Although he realizes such ewwie things are part of God’s intricate and beautiful creation, he’d be willing to exterminate these bugs, bugs that do nothing but threaten the existence of other living beings.

All the more it had to happen in the toilet, and of all times, when I was bathing.

To make things clear, I don’t really live in a luxury house, and so is my toilet. The hot water shower has been konked since who knows when and I have to bathe by using the old fashioned way – with tongs and water buckets, and hose which is connected with a pipe to constantly ensure I have enough supply of water to do my daily cleansing.

The routine is:

Splash myself with a tong-full of cold water and apply myself with a good concoction of shampoo or soap (preferably both of them depending on the circumstances) whenever I like.

But that’s not the point.

This bath was a different one. There was the presence of the centipede.

There it was, there I was. Eyes locked unto one another (if the centipede had any eyes), eyes burned with such burning desire to knock the opposition out with possibly one fatal blow.

The centipede made its move with such speed expected from the many- legged one. Kay Jin ducked to one side, and tempted to squish the bug with an almighty crush of left foot. But he opted out from doing that as it knew it could do horrors to his foot.

Instead, using his extravagant supply of a liquid substance which is also known as H2O, he made his attack.

Wave after wave of water was splashed against the centipede, pushing it towards the water exit. But this centipede was determined not to lose out that easily. Despite Kay Jin’s best efforts, the centipede clung unto the floor as if its life depended on it. It also lashed out at his opponent on a few occasions, when Kay Jin was refilling his bucket of water.

Frustrated at his fruitless attempts to driving the creature down the drain, Kay Jin plotted a way to end the battle once and for all.

His secret: A WMD (weapon of millipedes and centipede destruction)

With a blink of an eye, a secret recipe containing horrible mixture of sweat, water, shampoo, body odour, saliva, soap was prepared. A certain indescribable smell was produced immediately.

Sensing the danger, the centipede had nowhere else to go, but to retreat and eventually fall into the dark, dark abyss of a pithole known as the Indah Water manure resource center.

Though it was an epic struggle, the better side won in the end.

Relieved, the Jin went back to his daily scrubbings, maybe perhaps a bit extra from the battle he had fought today.

But who knows, the centipede may be enjoying itself in his new found home. And it may strike again at the suitable time.

And the thought of sleeping on the bed with millions of bugs underneath, just…